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Mr. Booze
Mr. Booze is a song sung by Peter and a bunch of alcoholics in "Friends of Peter G". Lyrics Peter: Mr. Booze Audience: Mr. Booze Peter: Mr. Booze Mr B Double O Z E Brian & Bruce: That sure spells booze. Peter: You will wind up wearing tattered shoes, if you mess with Mr. Booze. Brian & Bruce: Don't mess with Mr. Booze. Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze. Peter: Don't mess with Mr. B-Double O-Z-E. If you been so stiff they thought you died, You'll feel better once you've testified. Audience: Testify! Bruce: Oh yeah! Audience: Testify! Testify! Bruce (Speaking): I wanna testify, I wanna testify! Peter (Speaking): Well then cleanse yourself my son, cleanse yourself! Bruce (Speaking): One time I took a library book out and I fells asleep reading it and I left it under the bed. I forgot about it for three and a half years. I was gonna take it back on Amnesty Day, but on Amnesty Day I had a sip of Rosé wine and I never made it out of the house Peter: Who's to blame? Audience: Who's to blame? Peter: What's his name? Audience: We know his name, his name is Mr. Booze. Mr. Booze. Mr. B-Double O-Z-E don't ever choose. Any game you play with him, you'll lose, so don't mess with Mr. Booze! Peter: If your head feels like it's two miles wide, Audience: Two miles wide! Peter: You'll feel better once you've testified. Audience: Testify! Brian: Oh Yeah! Audience: Testify! Carl (Speaking): I wanna testify, I wanna testify! Peter (Speaking): Well come forward dear brother and testify! Carl (Speaking): I used to be a soda pop guy. Then I switched to the bottle. Now I don't leave my couch and I've seen every movie ever. You name a movie, I've seen it Audience Member (Speaking): Meet Dave. Carl (Speaking): Seen it. Audience Member (Speaking): The Eiger Sanction. Carl (Speaking): Seen it. Audience Member (Speaking): Donovan's Reef. Carl (Speaking): Seen it, Audience Member (Speaking): License to Drive! Carl (Speaking): Definitely seen it. Peter, Bruce & Brian: That's a shame. Audience: What a shame. Peter, Bruce & Brian: Who's to blame? Audience: for Corey Haim? His name is Mr. Booze. Mr. Booze. Mr. B-Double O-Z-E you must refuse. You'll make the obituary news, If you mess with Mr. Booze. If you've been so stiff they'd thought you died. You'll feel better once you've testified. Testify! Testify! Tom Tucker (Speaking): This man wants to testify! Peter (Speaking): Very well my brother, Let us lead him on the path of righteousness. Tom (Speaking): This poor gentleman used to speak in long, eloquent sentences. But after years of drinking he can only speak in short, choppy utterances. Why, at one time, if you asked him who his favorite musicians were he'd say Leonard Bernstein, Johann Sebastian Bach and Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. But thanks to that old devil hooch, it's all changed. Who's your favorite musician, Ollie? Ollie Williams (Speaking): Cher! Tom (Speaking): He doesn't even like Cher. Brian: Now alcohol makes a big man small, And can lead to a life of crime. Audience: Yeah! Bruce: Demon rum makes a gent a bum, And cash in before your time. Audience: Yeah! Dr. Hartman: Bootleg gin puts you in a spin, Till you don't even know your name. Audience: Yeah! Peter: You're a basket case, flat on your face, And there's only one guy to blame. Audience: Mr. B-Double O-Z-E. Mr. Booze. Mr. Booze. Mr. B-Double O-Z-E Don't ever choose. Peter: You will wind up wearing tattered shoes, If you mess with Mr. Booze. Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze. Peter: Oh Mr. Booze. Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze. Peter: Oh Mr. Booze. Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze. Don't mess with Mr. Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh. Don't mess with ah-ah. Oh Mr. Booze. Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Yeah! Category:Songs Category:Songs by Peter Category:Songs by Brian Category:Songs by Bruce Category:Songs by Carl Category:Songs by Tom Category:Songs by Ollie Category:Songs by Angela Category:Songs by Dr. Hartman Category:Real Life Songs